The Spoked Traveller | Restless adrenaline seeker – help!
Trails and advice cycling around the world as solo female cyclist and adventurer
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Restless adrenaline seeker – help!

Restless adrenaline seeker – help!

It’s been two weeks since returning home from Israel. After placing second in a mountain bike stage race, my adrenaline is back to normal and so is my appetite– not eating every two hours whatever comes across my face. The amount of food I was putting away was pretty impressive!

But something is wrong with me. I want to pack up again. A former writing/professor friend of mine once asked: “Is there some kind of psychological condition for wanting to travel so much?” Most likely. And yes, I got it bad.

Then, the other day while teaching travel writing, we were discussing a story about Iran, one of my students said that our culture is obsessed with highs. “We’re always looking for the next thing and can’t sit still.” I’ve known this for a long time, this nomadic angst.

But I notice it in other ways: when I drink coffee, for example, it’s got to be the strongest cup I can buy. When I work out now, I’m craving for my lungs to burn. When I choose to go dancing, and this is once a month — I am slowing down a bit — it’s an all-night event. And now living in Toronto, when meal time rolls around, I’m looking for something new. Have I eaten that before? Can I find something weird or new, exotic? I need that jolt, please.

I’m going to yoga this morning to mull it over, if I can focus long enough! What do you think? Are we all just restless waiting for the next big thing? Is life a series of these events and what is it that makes you restless if you’re not doing it?

  • Bruce L
    Posted at 09:41h, 22 October Reply

    If this isnt good enough then when will it be? I had the same question and came to zen which was the bitter medicine I needed. This can be the beginning of another journey for you…. or not. There are some good Youtube links alongside of this one. I did train in his monastery years ago besides my time here in Toronto living in a temple for 18 years while my other foot was in the working world. Hope it helps.

  • Sandra Phinney
    Posted at 09:28h, 22 October Reply

    At our writer’s retreat at Birchdale end of September, a colleague asked me WHY I do the things I do. She said I’m always living on the edge. I said something lame like “I’m always looking for story.” But that’s not true. I do a bazillion things that have nothing to do with looking for story. I’m looking for myself.

    I now realize that there’s a great big hole in my belly and I’m trying to fill it with adventure, success, food … whatever.

    But here’s the kicker: I wrote an essay about paddling and where my love of canoeing originated and what it means to me to get out into the wilderness (which also means, for me, some hard trips that tests my capacity and endurance as well as some simple float-with-the-current day trips.) Anyway, here’s my conclusion towards the end of the essay:

    “I once believed I paddled to get away from it all. But I’m not so sure it’s that simple. Wildlife photographer Peter Dombrovskis once said, “When you go out there, you don’t get away from it all. You get back to it all. You come home to what’s important. You come home to yourself.””

    Not sure if there’s anything applicable in your situation … but I’ll just say that at age 71 I’m starting to come home to myself. And that’s a damn hard journey. Still do those crazy things but I’m no longer running away. Well, not as often. Haha.

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